No way you can reserve for that many in a state park. — J.H.
“Hey, Jennifer,” I say to the mom of Nick’s friend Jay, “I’m putting together a team to make reservations for the camp out. Want in on it?”
“What do I need to do?”
What indeed.
“Um, you have to practice how to use this website. Then you have to be ready at 8:00 am sharp on November 1st. It’ll take maybe 45 minutes.”
“Fun!” she says. “I’m in!”
So are 18 other parents, 20 of us in all. Twenty is the number needed at the starting line of the site rush. Needed, I have determined, to give us a ghost of a chance to get our Memorial Day Weekend campsites.
Memorial Day Weekend.
The weekend everyone in the state goes camping.
WHAT INDEED
Over the past few days I have been haunted by What indeed.
Remember the wrong sign-up date on the flyer? Piece of cake. In the school office, Sarah has taken pity on me and sent out a second email announcement with the correction.
But the Reserve America website, which will make our sites available to all comers at the stroke of 8:00 am on November 1st? Not a piece of cake. Not at all.
It comes down to electrons. Electrons and key strokes. That’s the essence of a site rush, where we will be competing with hundreds of other potential campers for our sites, all of them sitting at their computers at the appointed hour with hungry eyes, fingers poised.
When not recruiting my team, I am daily on the phone with Reserve America customer service.
“How long will I have to get all my sites when they become available on November 1st?”
“For Memorial Weekend? Under a minute, sir. Maybe thirty seconds. Maybe ten.”
“Can you tell me the fastest way to reserve a site?”
Of course they can tell me. Each agent has a different method. Some say it takes three keystrokes. Some two. Some one. Nobody, it seems, knows exactly how the website will behave at the crucial hour.
“Sir, you can email our technical staff to ask. They’re very good at responding.”
I fire off an email with my question. No answer. I fire off another. No answer. I fire off another.
So it goes.
I ask Don and James, the Fern Hill dads who are practiced at getting those websites.
“I don’t exactly remember,” says James.
“I should have written it down,” says Don.
“Anyway,” says James,” “Their website is always changing.”
THE PEOPLE AT THE TOP
I begin practicing on the website, making up dates, running scenarios, devising strategies. I learn a three keystroke method which I know will work. Three keystrokes, three seconds. Too long. I learn a one keystroke method. But will it work? Or will it, as one agent tells me, cause the website to hiccough and log me out of my account?
Somewhere, someone has got to know. The site programmers, I hear, are in New York. Or Minnesota. Or China.
If the people at the bottom don’t know, the people at the top must. I discover that Reserve America is owned by a company called Active Network, headquarters in San Diego. I scour the web for their corporate directory. A name sticks its tongue out at me: Darko Dejanovic, Chief of Technology. It’s worth a shot.
I call the company and get voice mail.
“If you don’t know your party’s extension, please enter their full name.”
I spell out D-A-R-K-O. Voice mail spits back an extension.
I have the number.
Dear God, I have Darko Dejanovic’s phone number.
I get his secretary. I decide to come clean.
“I’m only a dad,” I say. “I have no experience. I’m going to have 150 campers and no sites. We just want a fair shot.”
The secretary is sympathetic.
“I’ll tell Darko,” she says.
Darko doesn’t call back.
BUT WHAT I’D REALLY LIKE TO DO
Somewhere in the middle of this I realize my team needs practice and I haven’t told them yet what they’re supposed to do. I haven’t told them because I still don’t know.
What I need is everyone in one room. I need a Power Point with a computer hookup. With time for questions.
No problem, pal. And I’m the Prince of Wales.
The answer comes. Video! I have screen capture—I can record anything and post it on You Tube! Will they all think I’m crazy? No matter. I set to work. I have to tell them everything I know.
I make not one video, but three. Each is ten minutes long. Surely everyone has half an hour to spare? These are the titles:
Fern Hill Reservations: Overview
Fern Hill Reservations: Reserve America Mechanics
Fern Hill Reservations: Team Communication
I post the videos, password protected. I email links to the team. I give up sleeping.
One night Nora has had enough.
“Come to bed. Now.”
I follow her upstairs.
I dream of the one-click method. Will it work? Or must it be three clicks? The speed of light is finite, so there must be a time lag. Perhaps we should start our keystrokes not at 8:00 am, but at one-half second before 8:00 am. How long does it take an electron particle to get through the cloud? Is it a problem of quantum entanglement, where a particle has two natures, and may teleport itself?
Suddenly, illumination.
Two different browsers. That’s it! Each team member must have two browsers logged separately into the site. Two identities! One for the one-click method, the other for three-clicks.
I force myself to wake up. I scribble a note in the dark.
It says: Make a 4th video.
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Camp director continues next time with Sign-up.
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EXPRESS YOURSELF!
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{ 14 comments… read them below or add one }
This is going to be an amazing camping trip!!! Never has a trip been more thoroughly and thoughtfully planned. We “I’m never good enough” people do have a knack for doing things well. A blessing and a curse . . . .
I like your attitude, Robin. You can be on the team.
You are a beautiful writer, and I am quite a certain – a beautiful soul.
Thank you, Wolf – for being both.
Troublemaker!
I have heard we might have faked the moon landing… how can I be sure you’re really going camping?
You could come with. Plus, I can show you Darko Dejanovic’s phone number.
As you look back on all this I hope you will look at it as a campsite story filled with laughter
Laughter is good, but I’ll settle for just being able to look back on all this.
Holy cow! When you commit to something, you really follow through. No wonder you’ve accomplished so much more than I have! I envy you your determination and drive! And your writing – you can make anything interesting!
The fool who persists . . .
Is Darko REALLY his name or did you change it to protect the innocent? I love the name no matter if you changed it – very fitting for an expert that never calls you back. Ah, I remember the good old days when you just packed up your family with a tent and some supplies and went camping. This camping trip is too much with us and you ARE a prince for undertaking what seems like an impossible task. Still hoping you got the sites!
Darko is real: Darko lives!
Hi Wolf,
I am sitting here commiserating with you. I have helped plan Boy Scout Camporees for a minimum of 350..Plenty big job..I loved every minute of it.
Here are a couple of fun items I hope you may keep in mind when your camp adventure happens.
#1..Show the kids some fun things…..get a “paper cup”..not foam….fill with water, and if you have a camp fire, set the paper cup right down in the hot coals..the paper cup will not burn and the water will boil after a few minutes…Magic !!
#2.. And if you have a camp fire..find a couple of feet of copper tubing…the fire must have a really hot bed of coals, and if you get the fire going…set the copper tubing over the hot coals..the flames will take on hues of brilliant blue and green
a very pleasant evening. Good luck !!! Jim
Can we make a Zorch too?
Nora remembers the Firefall from Glacier Point at Yosemite when she was a kid.
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